9 Reasons Why I Deactivated Facebook

I saw the headlines yesterday about job interviewers increasingly asking for your password or for you to log in to Facebook during the interview and I thought sharing my thoughts on why I deactivated (have yet to delete, but so far, I have no temptation to go back to “reactivate my Facebook) my personal Facebook page with you would be fruitful.

We live in a hyper-connected world and it is quite unheard of for someone from Generation Y to not have Facebook.  As some of you may know, it was one of my New Years Resolutions (well, two years in a row, really) to go on Facebook less to increase my productivity.  I pretty much massively failed both years and instead of logging on online, I would log in with my iPhone Facebook app.  It got to a point that you could say I was Facebook addicted- I would update my newsfeed, oh, maybe 20 times a day, sometimes I would refresh the newsfeed it again about 10 minutes after I updated it already.  Yes.. it was that bad.

When I first joined Facebook back in 2008 it was really exciting to reconnect with long lost elementary school friends, high school friends, and even people I met briefly but wanted to keep in touch with.

However, somehow Facebook reared its ugly side and I started to question why I was addicted to Facebook so much.  So I decided a few days ago to deactivate it.

Before I clicked “okay” to deactivate my account, Facebook said “Are you sure?  _______ will miss you!  _______ will miss you!  _____ will miss you!” and I found that even more creepy that Facebook would give one last “nag” and proceeded with the deactivate account button.

So here are my reasons why I deactivated my personal Facebook page.

Privacy, privacy, privacy

I’ve always been a private person (even when I’m not blogging incognito on this blog) and I was really unhappy about the practices of Facebook where they would change the privacy “laws” or whatever, on Facebook and NOT TELL YOU ABOUT IT!

Each time, I would change my privacy details AFTER I read about it on another friend’s newsfeed, about how they changed the privacy laws and in order for your profile page not to be viewed by the public, you would need to log in and change the tick boxes in the privacy section.  I’m not sure how many times I had to readjust my settings to suit my privacy needs while maintaining a public Facebook profile (amongst my Facebook friends anyways)

The last straw for me, was this most recent update.  I make sure that my “main” Facebook profile picture doesn’t include a picture of my face in case people search for me on Facebook.  However, with this most recent update assault to privacy, ALL of your profile pictures, even the ones from years ago, are visible to people who search for you.

And there was no way that you could undo that with a privacy setting adjustment.  I ended up deleting the pictures with my face to start and to “adjust” with this new update.

Facebook is … like high school all over again

Although I didn’t have a terrible time in high school (I certainly miss the egocentricism and the lack of responsibility except to myself), because I have a lot of high school friends on my Facebook page, I found that in Facebook, people wanted to add more and more friends (I think I know someone from high school who has over 1000 friends) because its some sort of popularity contest.

The more Facebook friends you have is not an indicator of how popular you are, okay?  Some people try to add you even when you met them once.  And they never try to talk to you on Facebook.  Just stalk you.. that’s all.

My feelings also get hurt when I find out someone defriended me.  Sniff.

Facebook is Judge-Y

I’m not saying Facebook itself is judge-y, but the people on Facebook are judge-y.  Going through difficult times like having a death in your family, or being admitted to hospital (and then taking pictures of it and sharing with the world what room you’re in), or even a break up is hard enough as it is.  Yes- true story- many of my facebook friends have been taking pictures of their hospital stays and sharing their gory pictures…and even announcing what room they’re in!

You don’t need to announce these events to “your” world.

I don’t need my entire Facebook 200+ people on my friends list to know what is happening in my life.  I don’t need them to judge me even more than I’m judging myself.  Thank-you-very-much.

It’s creepy that you know what’s happening in someone’s life when you never talk to them in person

Not sure if it’s just me, but I find it kind of sad when you talk to someone, or you bump into someone, and you say “ooooh heyyyy! How are you doing these days??” and you pretend that you didn’t see what they’ve been up to on Facebook because that would make for awkward conversation.

Or when someone does mention, that they know what you’ve been up to because of Facebook.

Not sure which scenario is is more awkward.

Does Facebook bring the best in people or the worst?

Hey, I’m all for tooting your own horn, but please don’t toot it on an hourly basis.  No, I don’t need to know that you’re hungry, or you’re so excited to have the weekend off and that you miss your hubby.  No, I don’t need to hear that you are very proud of the perfectly shaped stool you produced today.

No, I don’t need to see that you’ve achieved a high score on Bejewelled, or Farmville, or whatever Facebook game you’ve downloaded.

Kony 2012.  ‘Nuff said.

Herd mentality. Facebook amplifies herd mentality- people don’t understand what they’re promoting and telling their friends to believe in.

Kony 2012 infiltrated my Facebook feed for a few days and in my ignorance and ambivalence, I did not click on it to find out more.  Just read the newsfeed headline.  First, Kony 2012 was a good cause.  People donated to Kony to help the children.  Then Kony was found to be a sham.  Then Kony was found by police and caught for another strange reason.

Facebook is Awkward (Friends, Colleagues, Family)

When a colleague adds me on Facebook I find it awkward.  Will they know that I don’t want to add them.  Will I hurt their feelings if I don’t add them?  Of course, I end up adding them and because I’m a Generation Y individual who isn’t that tech savvy (yes, I know, an anomaly) to group friends and colleagues in one group to limit what they see…

Even then when you limit what your colleagues see, they may be suspicious that you’ve blocked access to the gossip juice from the “Photos of _____” page.  Will it be awkward because they know you’ve blocked access for them?

Facebook is a Productivity KILLER!

I know that loading Facebook newsfeed on my iPhone app 20 times a day IS NOT NORMAL. Although many times I spend perhaps 1-2 minutes looking at Facebook, sometimes, I would be looking at Facebook and a friends friend would post something on a friends wall.  Then I would look at that friends friend and look through their pictures, etc.

Then it would hit me.  WTF AM I DOING?? I DON’T EVEN KNOW THIS PERSON AND I’M STALKING THEM.

Sometimes I would bargain with myself- “okay.  Just one more friend to check out and that’s it.”

When you have a blog, full time school, and part-time work, wasting time is not a good idea.

Facebook brought the Green-Eyed Monster Out

Being in my late twenties, I know that it’s “the time” for all this society approved pressures and shiznat, like getting engaged, getting married, having children, getting good jobs.

I couldn’t bear to see another person engaged.  I just couldn’t.  Although I was happy for them.. deep down inside, I was jealous.  I’ll admit it.  The selfish, whiny individual in me was jealous.

Being exposed to someone you know getting engaged, or looking at their happily married wedding pictures, or looking at status updates from being “in a relationship” to “engaged” to “married”.  It was “Keeping Up with the Jones” in a sense.  I would see the “rock and roll” lifestyle being lived out by my friends and think *sigh* I wish my life were as breezy as that.

Yeah.  I’m drinking my Haterade and I’m proud of it.

Facebook Withdrawal Syndrome

Although one day after I deleted my Facebook, I must admit, I was suffering from Facebook Withdrawal Syndrome.

FWS for short.

The signs and symptoms of this syndrome is sweaty palms, confusion as to why the Facebook icon on your iPhone is not there, and curiosity as to what the people who you don’t really talk to in person or on the phone or even associate with is up to.  The important thing to know about FWS is that it is temporary and is fleeting.  The treatment for FWS is to contact a friend or someone you actually care about and talk to in real life on a regular basis and this can be done by phone, in person, text, or by email.  Usually this treatment suffices, and in extreme cases, FWS may lead to relapse and reactivation of Facebook.  It may take multiple tries to rid the addiction to Facebook, but with support and in-person contact with real friend, full remission can be achieved.

I can’t wait to spend real-live person time with my boyfriend, my family, and my friends.  I don’t need to see what’s going on in other people’s lives.

Readers- would love to hear your thoughts.  What are your thoughts on Facebook?  Please don’t try and convince me to reactivate Facebook! I don’t need to suffer from FWS ;)

 

About

Young is a writer and former owner of Young and Thrifty and the main "twitter' behind Young and Thrifty's twitter account. She lives in Vancouver, BC and enjoys long walks on the beach, spending time with her anxious dog, and finding good deals. If you like what you read, consider signing up for email updates.

126 Responses to 9 Reasons Why I Deactivated Facebook

  1. Good for you!

    A few months ago when I branched out into a ‘passion’ site, I made a decision not to do anything I didn’t want to do.. so that meant not marketing where I wasn’t interested.

    Facebook got the boot.. Although I had set up FB accounts for all my other sites, I said to heck with them. I don’t like FB and decided not to use them! :)

    I think more and more pp are leaving FB, btw.

    dee

    • @Dee- Thanks for visiting! Really? It’s not just me? I haven’t told any of my close friends yet, I was sort of waiting to see if anyone would notice haha..

  2. Excellent reasons for not using Facebook. I’ve become decidedly more picky as I’ve gotten older as to who I will friend, and who can see my info. I still use it because I have family far away and it’s the best way to keep up with them.

    Funny: Reading this through Google reader, the ad at the bottom of your post? was for Facebook.

    • @Sarah- lol.. I had no idea Facebook needed to advertise on Google! Maybe they are ramping it up for the IPO. Me too- I’ve been picky. I even made it impossible for people do search me via my name unless they already were a friend of a friend.

  3. I definitely agree with all of this. It took me until this year to finally join facebook just because I was wary of all of these kinds of things. I recently gave in since I figured it would help with my new blog, but it really is just a time waster that creates all kinds of problems.

    • @MM- I think Facebook can be very useful for a blog or a business, especially if you have a person associated with this facebook page. I was just thinking it was more difficult to use when you have all these people you know from high school or from little areas of your life.

      • I do agree with that. Part of the reason I finally got on facebook was for my blog, but I couldn’t resist the temptation to look up all old friends, acquaintances, relatives, etc. Now I’m just not comfortable using it for business and it ends up being a time waster instead.

  4. I’ve never tried Facebook, but you’ve reaffirmed my reasons for avoiding it. I find Linked-in to be difficult enough with all the people I don’t know asking for connections. I found it interesting that some employers ask for access to Facebook. I know that many employers do at least a casual online search. I think pictures are the biggest problem for employment candidates. It’s hard to support hiring some guy in a meeting when a young woman shows her online search result of a picture of the guy half-naked funneling beer. You can try to downplay such pictures, but in the end they carry a lot of weight in a hiring decision.

    • @Michael James- lol and who doesn’t have pictures of themselves funneling beer too eh? We all have pictures tagged of us that we aren’t proud of (and then we untag them) but people still see these pictures, especially if they recognize your face.

  5. I SOOOOO feel the same way. In all your arguements. I’m so torn about what my kids are going to be doing with all this social media, the likes and comments etc… is it not enough they have to deal with it off line, and then onlline too.

    Plus, the time WASTED on these platforms is too much. I don’t know why we are soo into this!

    I wish it would burst and go away, quite frankly, but it seems to be getting bigger and more harmful.

    • @Marina- Yeah, I can’t imagine what it must be like to be in highschool right now and have facebook (even though you have to be over a certain age to have facebook, right?) It must be all about a popularity contest even more than it is for adults. I think we’re into it because it lets us live vicariously through the lens of our friends and family and even those who we only know as acquaintances. I guess its kind of like gossip magazines. When you see a status being changed from “in a relationship” to “single” or any other big event, you always wonder what happened and it piques your curiousity. People can’t look away from runaway trains.

  6. Wow, that’s quite the post!

    I’ve never heard of employers asking for Facebook information in an interview. I think that’s highly unprofessional, and I would be very hesitant to take a job under those conditions. What does it say about an employer if they are doing that? Is that someone I would really want to work for? These are the questions I’d be asking myself.

    That said, I think deactivating your Facebook profile is a little bit overkill. I agree that Facebook could do a better job of outlining their privacy changes. But if you stay on top of it, Facebook’s privacy settings are actually quite easy to manage. What you’re saying about all of your profile pictures being visible to everyone is misinformation. With Facebook’s new Timeline, there are “profile pictures” and there are “cover pictures”. Profile pictures can be kept private – cover pictures can not. Solution – don’t use pictures of yourself as cover pictures. And yes, I agree, its stupid that cover pictures cannot be made private.

    You can also limit how much of your profile appears in search results, or you can specify that your profile cannot be found at all in searches. Under this regime, only you can add people as friends as no one else can find you. At the end of the day, you have complete control over your Facebook exposure. You also have complete control over what you see from other people. If you are tired of reading someone’s constant updates, but still want to keep them as “friends”, you can modify your subscription to their updates so that you only get certain kinds of updates. I think with a little bit of management, Facebook remains an extremely powerful and useful tool.

    • @E&M- Yeah, I think it’s unprofessional too. That’s akin to asking about your marital status, your religion etc. since Facebook often shows these sorts of things on the profile. How can I stay on top of the privacy setting changes when they don’t tell me when they change? I actually am one of the few who doesn’t have “timeline” and that’s probably why I was able to see other people’s profile pics (those who were not on Timeline). I found timeline took too long to load up.

      • I definitely agree with you that Facebook needs to do a better of job of publicizing changes to their privacy options. Thankfully, with the user base that Facebook has, most changes are picked up and written about by others very quickly. I think Helly’s comment later in this thread put it best when she said that Facebook, like any life application, is what you make of it.

  7. Not a big fan of FB either. Only have 10 friends on there and log in once a week. I’m always fighting with the site’s interface, and like you said it’s a productivity killer. Have to be careful on the internet these days. I heard about this other social media site where university students are encouraged to take candid pictures of strangers and post them online.

    • @LI- Really? That’s creepy. I can’t help but think that social media is sort of the root cause of the riots in Vancouver (or any riot etc.) just because people think its cool to post pictures of them causing vandalism. There are many great things about social media, but I think social media and facebook has a dark side too.

  8. I totally agree. I was “addicted” to facebook when it first went live to my school (remember when you had to be in school to be a part of facebook?). Now it’s everybody, and like you said it’s a little creepy to me that my friend’s parents are “friending” me. I like you Mrs. Smith, but we’re not friends…weird. Ditto that employers want to see your facebook…weird. I look at my personal page, maybe once a month. Honestly it’s too much work and if I’m really friends with someone I know what they’re doing and don’t need to see it via facebook.

    • @Kari- lol TOTALLY REMEMBER THAT. I remember it was the “new thing” and I was wary of moving away from FRIENDSTER (remember that? lol). It is a lot of work, I agree, and I also find it strange that people of the older generation want to be your friends.

      I hear that one way to work around that is that many young people have TWO facebook accounts. One for family and colleagues, and the other for wild party hardy friends.

  9. I haven’t touched my FB account in months, although it’s still there. The whole “change the privacy policies without telling one” got to me. But so did the fact there’s so much stuff scrolling by so fast it’s impossible to keep-up unless you’re watching it 24×7!!! I had the same issue with Google+ – information overload!!!

    • @Schultzter- Yeah, that pretty much sums it up in a nutshell- information overload. And for some reason I couldn’t refrain myself from updating so often and filling myself up with this information!

  10. It is a great way to keep in touch with people I went to high school with and friends from my past but with but all these changes they make are really getting annoying.

    I wonder when the next big thing comes out and blows FB out of the water.

    • @Steve- Yeah- they keep reinventing themselves and selling our private information to businesses and companies. Not sure what will happen next!

  11. It’s really hard to just avoid using Facebook again because it’s not a necessity but a useful tool for many reasons. Considering the article of allowing your employers to have your password and login, goes against the whole idea of privacy. Today’s privacy is already thrown out of the window to most website we use. As part of the GEN Y, I’m going to close my Facebook account for good in the near future.

  12. I love fb. It lets me connect with friends and family. It lets us share pics of thing we encounter in our travels. Ive foun countless schoolmate and friends I hadnt seen in yrs.

    • @Dan- That’s true- those are definite the “pros” to facebook. (well, mine anyway). It was just turning into a whole different monster.

    • Good for you Dan but I’m sure you’re one of those annoying facebook users that forgot how to use a phone and actually call up some of those people.

  13. I love facebook, I don’t think I could quit. I don’t waste a lot of time on there though, I mainly just look for updates of people that I know. And I like to look at pictures.

  14. Tough call. I enjoy keeping in touch with people I wouldn’t necessarily hear much of otherwise, but it can be a time drain (hello Farmville!) and sometimes I get jealous of stuff other people post (petty, but true.). It was good for me when I was unemployed, but I try to limit my time on it now.

    • @mcb- I never got into Farmville lol :) I do enjoy the keeping in touch part too- but I just found that I was “keep in touch” with toooo many people, even some people who I met traveling and never talked to again.

  15. I can’t count how many times I vicariously nodded my head as I read.

    One of my ‘friends’ who I haven’t seen, spoken to, or really thought of for the lasts 10 years posted very graphic pictures of her c-section yesterday… the types of pictures you don’t want to discover as you’re eating lunch kind of graphic.

    I agree, that’s Facebook gets more and more creepy. The thought of being THAT connected with people is scary. What scares me more is my interest in knowing what’s happening in everyone’s lives. It’s an addiction and I’ve been considering deactivating my account for the last few weeks.

    • @SheBloggs- UGhhhh C section pictures? C’mon!! The great thing about deactivating is that it’s not permanent and you can reactivate it to network if you like.

  16. I honestly cannot believe how brave you are! I could never do this, but I use Facebook to keep in touch with a lot people (including family), so I think it would seriously be a detriment to my social life, unless we all agreed to meet on some less sketchy platform (or, we could try in-person gatherings; what a novel idea!)

    All your reasons for leaving are completely valid and very important for users to consider. I have been guilty of the green-eyed monster too as Facebook tends to portray everyone’s lives in a very flattering way :)

    Good for you, all the same. I am glad to hear that some of us are still able to keep on living without being tethered to our past!

    • @FF- It really does, doesn’t it? I know I’m petty but I can’t help it :) Might as well fill my world with my own positivity instead of others! Well, I don’t think I’m that brave. They don’t put many barriers there if you want to “reactivate it again” as evidenced by my accidental reactivation last night and deactivation again lol.

  17. Y&T Good move!

    However, there is one problem with deactivating your account – facebook does NOT delete your personal information . This is why the Canadian Govt. was after facebook last year over privacy concerns. So even though you delete your account, the information is still there for facebook and advertisers to use. So even though you took the noble step of deleting your account the info is still there! They use the excuse in case you want to re-join again, but that is not the real reason.

    What most people don’t realize is what facebook really is. When a developer creates an app they then get access to your personal info – for marketing purposes of course. ;) They can use that info as they see fit. Most of the apps are created by marketing firms actually. This is that waiver that says “by installing this app it can see your profile and….etc.”. Facebook makes a lot of money by allowing this information to be used.

    On another note if an employer asked me for my facebook login, I would actually tell them that if they ask a second time they could expect a letter from my lawyer – at $500 per hour the choice is there’s. Thats not the kind of company I want to work for!

    Cheers
    The Dividend Ninja

    • @TDN- I remember that announcement from the CDN gov’t. I hate that waiver and always stop when they say “you are allowing access by _____ to use your personal information etc” Gave me the heebie jeebies. FB is trying to take over the world!

  18. I got off FB…but not de-activating it. Simply not logging in…and stoppping the email alerts. There have been times I have gone back on and proceeded to waste an hour on there…but if you just don’t go on it, you’ll be fine!

    THe only hard part is if people use FB to send messages and invites…you’ll just have to get them to text you! Or send a real e-mail.

    • @jay- Yes! The invite thing is annoying though you could deactivate those requests and emails. I couldn’t just not log in I think. Don’t have enough will power in me. Thanks for sharing your FB avoidance strategy!

    • @Livia- Good for you girl! I tried to log into my BLOG FB account and I accidentally logged into my personal one and accidentally reactivated it last night to my absolute HORROR. Then I deactivated it again! So I’ll start counting too. We should start FB Addicts Anonymous. 12 Step Program.

  19. Well done!

    I have an account but I don’t use it at all. I have disabled all notifications as well. I need to know about Facebook from a business perspective so I can’t really not be present but I don’t participate and I never have either.

    • @PIE- A lot of businesses have Facebook Fan Pages where you can “like” the page :) Businesses are all hounding on FB- it seems like a good tool for business for sure.

  20. Good call Y&T.

    I’ve been considering doing the same for some time.

    I might be on that thing every 3 months at best. If friends want to get in touch with me, they know where to find me :)

    You have no obligation to hand over your FB login to an prospective employer, that is nuts.

    • @MOA- Well, if you have enough will power to NOT go on every day,I think you’re okay ;) I think the deactivation is necessary for those without will power (like me)

  21. There are more and more people who are quitting Facebook. In fact, I read somewhere recently that membership is actually going down in North America, and all Facebook’s growth is from the developing world.

    • @FU- I’m surprised you didn’t have a smart alec comment! Interesting to hear that FB’s growth is from the developing world. I can certainly see that.

    • @FS- Do you go on it often, Sam? I really like twitter too even though most of the people on there for interaction are those who you never met in real life.

      • Twitter is awsome! 140 characters then STFU!!! I only follow people I know so even if I only check it on the train twice a day I’m still not scrolling more than a couple pages to catch-up. And it only takes a few seconds to read each tweet. If there’s something really interesting I can star it and come back to later.

        For companies, blogs, etc. there’s RSS feeds in Google Reader.

        It’s nice to have that separation. I know I can flush my backlog in Reader without missing something a friend says. And I know my Twitter is a quick catch-up on my friends without and any corporate-ad-crap interlaced.

        If I could do that with FB – and they had had a bit more respect for my privacy – I would still be active there. But I can’t. So I’m not.

  22. Never had a facebook account, even though my friends keep nagging me to join. :D

    The more I read about it (like this article, for example), the more I’m convinced I’m making the right decision.

  23. As much as I’d like to get rid of Facebook.. not being part of the biggest social media network while running a side-business would be business suicide.

    That said.. I just went through and ‘unsubscribed’ from 9 out of every 10 friends on my list. Why do I care what people that I’ve never met in real life are thinking about and all of that? Extreme productivity killer.. it’s time to switch the tables and make it work more for me.

    Great post btw.

    • @Len- I would love to unsubscribe people and that’s probably what i should do. But it doesn’t eliminate the guilt I feel when people ask me to be my friend and I don’t want to be theirs.

  24. Excellent post! I am strongly considering this myself. I find it to be a time suck, and why do I need to care about people that I haven’t seen in ages? I get a lot of spam from there too from people who need me to be sucked into this or that game. ;)

    About the employers, that is totally messed up. I believe that employers can use whatever they want to use when hiring an employee, just like the employee can use whatever they want; it goes both ways. However, I personally would not work for someone that wanted me to log into Facebook.

    The #1 has got to be the privacy. I don’t trust anyone with that kind of data, not the government, and most certainly not Mark Zuckerberg.

    • @Invest it Wisely- Mark Zuckerberg seems pretty shady, doesn’t he? :) yeah, the privacy thing bothers me a lot…if they announced it or stopped changing the privacy settings I would be happier.

  25. Love this post! I have pretty much abandoned Facebook, for many of the same reasons as you’ve mentioned, mostly because it is such a time suck & I could use my time so much more wisely. I haven’t deactivated it, only because my entire family lives in other provinces & I do like to catch up & see photos of my nieces & nephew from time to time, since I see them so rarely. I didn’t realize that everyone could see all your profile pics, though – wow I don’t like that one bit!

    • @Pamela- Thanks for visiting again! Well- it seems like I was wrong about the profile pic thing! I’m just not FB savvy enough to figure it out, is all ;)

  26. Wow, this threads has a lot of comments, seems no one is indifferent!

    For me, Facebook is not much of a productivity killer, but a “real” friend killer.

    I knew everything about my friend on their FB.. then when meeting them for a drink, I already knew everything. They never updated me on their lives because it was already all posted on facebook and they took for granted that we all read their stuff,

    The more day passes, the less I am tempted to read other people’s statuses, or update mine. I now take pictures of new stuff, then decide not to post it to let my friend have the surprise when they come and visit (happened just yesterday with our new dining table).

    and another major downside for me is all the corporate infiltration of facebook. I went there for friends updates, not for 238457234 ads, promotions, free stuff, posted from friends trying to get a fake gift certificate by getting other to “like” their kid’s bedroom or whatever.

    Facebook will soon be on the decline stage IMO. They should get their IPO out soon.

    • @Beach Boy- That’s how I feel too. There’s nothing to talk about anymore when you see everything on facebook. It really changed the “landscape” of conversation for me. I would rather keep in touch with people on a more meaningful level than seek empty validation from others in hopes that someone will read my status update and “like” it ;)

  27. I agree with you on FB being a productivity killer (then again, this can apply to just about any website you’re active on, like Pinterest, and is more a personal issue than a FB issue ;-)), but for everything else, not so much.

    For the profile pictures– that’s actually not true. You CAN set your privacy setting for that particular album to be visible to friends only, or whatever you like, just like any other album. That way when a non-friend finds your FB page, they will not be able to see any photo except the one already on display on your front page– they can’t click on it to see your entire “profile photos” album.

    Also, those early settings from a couple years ago where you can choose NOT to have people find you by name? Those are still in effect :-)

    For everything else: FB, like any other endeavor, both online and offline, is what you make of it. When Google+ first came out and so many people thought it would be the holy grail, one of my friends cited “drama free” as a reason for switching to G+ over FB. And I was like– uh, you have like 700 friends, you just add people indiscriminately, what did you expect? I don’t have that problem at all because I’m careful about whom I add– I won’t add drama queens, or if I’ve already friended someone who turns that way, I just block ‘em. It’s a FRIEND issue, not a FB vs G+ vs. whatever issue.

    I personally find it very cool that people with whom I’d ordinarily have lost touch are now a part of my lives, if only in small updates every now and then. I’m not creeped out at all if someone asks me about something that I haven’t told them about (but posted on FB about)– I mean, that’s the whole point of posting something on FB, isn’t it? To share with your friends. I find it efficient. And if it’s something I’d rather not disclose, then I can either a) not write about it or b) post it but make it visible to only a subset of my friends. Also, if someone brings up something I posted, I feel more flattered than creeped out, because to me, it shows that they care enough about me to remember to ask about something I posted.

    Bottom line: FB is what you, personally, make of it. And for me, with my FB-friendly friends (i.e. no drama queens, folks that don’t care if you add/don’t add them, etc) it’s an excellent vehicle for staying in touch and interacting with friends and acquaintances, both past and present. I’m sorry that wasn’t the case for you, and totally understand that it’s not for everyone, so I’m glad that at least you still have Twitter and your blog for the rest of us to interact with you! :-)

    • @Helly- Awe Helly you’re awesome. I always love your comments! Yes you’re right- it’s a friend issue!! I can’t blame facebook too much it’s just that I don’t have the “balls” so to speak to delete these insignificant drama queens out of my life. Maybe if I do go back and reactivate one day, I’m going to be trimming my list. Big time.

      • IF you ever decide to go back and wind up with some drama queens again, you can always just block them from your feed without having to “unfriend” them. I’ve had to do that with one or two more annoying folks. Of course, sheer morbid curiosity would make me visit their page about once a week just to reaffirm that I did the right thing in blocking them, but at least I wasn’t bombarded with it on my own feed :-)

        • @Helly- LOL yup it’s all about the morbid curiosity! I think if I eliminated the feed to people I actually care about, there wouldn’t be too much action unfortunately because my friends aren’t the drama queens.

  28. If I didn’t use facebook for business, I would have never signed up. It’s too many hoops to jump through for information about friends (mostly acquaintances) I don’t need or want to know about. Twitter has become my new, easier to deal with favorite.

    • @JP- I really like twitter too! At first I was skeptical of twitter but now I’m a bigger fan than facebook. Not sure why..!

  29. Some else over at Cloud Ave raised the point of federated web sites and single sign on. Giving up your facebook, google, yahoo or other password could give an employer access to a lot of other sites too. Or even sign you up for other sites and services using facebook authentication!!!

  30. Totally agree with you. But I’m not going to deactivate just yet….still addicted. :P And if a boss ever asked to directly violate my privacy like that, I’d walk away. That place wouldn’t be for me. If they want to stalk me on fb, that’s fine. I don’t really have anything to hide. But to ask for my password or log in to my social network? No, thank you.

    • @femmefrugality- It’s hard to get rid of that addiction! I went on my Blog FB to see if any profile pictures changed since I deactivated and I felt a little scuzzy after that.

  31. When I recently went through a round of hiring for new employees, the administrator that was setting up the interview appointments for me thought it would also be funny to send me their Facebook profiles. Needless to say, it definitely jaded some of the candidates. You can’t un-know what you find out. They would have been better off not having had a public Facebook account.

    • @MMD- That’s scary! Did they just go ahead and search them up to see their profile pictures? Yeah you’re right- certainly can’t “unknow” what you find out!

  32. I deleted my Facebook about six months ago and haven’t looked back. You really gave a good overview of why I felt it wasn’t for me anymore.

    I wonder how long it will take for legal challenges to the “sign on to Facebook and show me everything before I hire you” to come about. It is illegal in my state to discriminate (for example) against a woman who is pregnant – what if an employer sees ultrasound pictures before deciding not to hire? It seems like a bad idea for potential employers to publicly announce they are Facebook-stalking potential employees. Even if they win the lawsuit, they still have to fight the lawsuit.

    • @Jane- Yeah totally! I guess its a lesson for current facebook users who are looking for a job to make sure their privacy settings are on good!

  33. Interesting post. I thought about deleting my account once but realized that I pretty much need to be there since I talk about SEO and social media, and I can’t very well do that if I keep deleting my accounts from things, right? lol

    With that said I did the same thing with Klout because as much as I hated it I kept checking in initially to see what my score was and how I competed against certain people. That kind of thing wastes time and drives you nuts, and I was irked anyway.

    • @Mitch- Is Klout still available? The Klout score buzz seems to have died down. Yeah, I think that keeping a business FB page is definitely fine. I was just talking about my personal one where I have all my high school contacts/

      • Well, the problem is that you have to have a personal account in order to create a business page; can’t have one without the other.

        As for Klout, I don’t think it’s died down at all, as I still see lots of messages about it on Twitter every day. At least I don’t have to personally deal with it anymore.

        By the way, did you know your CommentLuv doesn’t work?

        • @Mitch- Yes I do but I don’t know how to fix it! :( Yeah you’re right- but I actually made up a fake personal account on FB for my blog FB page (I’m sure I’ll get booted off soon though).

  34. Yup, I deleted my facebook about a month ago and I’m totally pleased! I never ever wrote on there and would only check it like once a month or less. I totally dislike the platform and think it’s very unnatural to have a forum where everyone you know is at your fingertips. Why do I want people to write what my friends say on my wall? I always got creeped out by the voyeurism…oh yeah and I did a lot of voyeur’ing whenever I was on :)

    • @ADP- It’s voyeurism to the max! I was creeped out by myself and my own voyeuristic tendencies. It’s certainly not something I could say I am proud of.

  35. I deleted my account about two months ago. Although I initially found FB useful for staying in touch with friends and family who lived far away, there seemed to be fewer and fewer posts from people I was actually interested in following. The most prolific posters were generally pretty silly. It got to be a huge time suck, and I could no longer justify the privacy intrusion. After a week or so of withdrawal twitches my head felt so much less cluttered!

    • @Christa- My head feels much less cluttered too! My life has more purpose and intention now- less “chatter” in my head :)

  36. I remember when Facebook was all the craze when it first launched and everyone was joining, it was fun collecting friends and reaching out to those from high school, elementary school and past jobs that we hadn’t spoken to in like 10 years. Now with the new “timeline” layout I am beginning to not like it as much.

    However, Facebook has turned into something else for me then what I first intended it for. I recently changed my “name” on Facebook to an alias type and only really use it for promoting my blog now, posting on company pages and the likes, it’s good for that, to get my blog across and I don’t use it for the personal aspect anymore.

    • @Justine- Thanks Justine! I remember those days too. It was so exciting to catch up with people. The “Timeline” layout did it for me too- not sure what made it unappealing for me though!

  37. I feel your pain. I would Love LOVE to get rid of facebook!!! I don’t update my profile, I also can’t be bothered to read much of the newsfeed. My problem is I need it for my company facebook page. How Ironic is that? Facebook is a marketing tool, 1 of the biggest out there. If it wasn’t for that, I would of stopped Facebook over a year ago.
    I read somewhere “Facebook is full of Whiners and Braggers” and that pretty much sums it up. People update their facebook either to complain or Brag. And Yes I hate the I miss my husband posts, and all the baby brags. I guess I am a bit of a crabby person, I don’t allow too many onto my facebook, I do reject people, and I have no problems doing so!
    I know of two young people about your age that have deactivated their facebook in the last few months. You are not alone in this decision. I hate when people have relationship problems and plaster it all over facebook!!! Seriously keep it to yourselves! I finally wrote to one couple that have this on and off again marriage of 10 years, to Quit asking friends advice and seek a Marriage Therapist.( I did this in a private pm – Nicely telling them that although friends are fine to ask for support, that they’ll never work out their issues, cause friends only see or hear one side) I haven’t seen another fight from them yet ( knocks on wood) Then there’s those that can’t keep their yaps quiet…. Example Family deaths, and people are spreading the word by sending their sorry’s for your loss, before all family is contacted. I think People simply don’t think about these things. Some things should be done on the phone. How about Birthdays? I got 0 phone calls from friends this last year, but 50 Happy Birthday’s on my wall. Boy don’t I feel special ( NOT) I also hate when people want to have a chatroom conversation, …. seriously call me! I find it’s getting to be a much colder world of less human contact by the day. It totally makes me feel sad, as I watch my teenagers live by typing. I sit and wonder if they are going to be “THAT” person who text’s the other person across the table” instead of using their voice…..

    • @theresa- Every single word you wrote rung true for me! It is the biggest marketing tool out there and all the companies know it. That’s why there are so many corporate pages where you have to “like” the page in order to get your freebie (like my Neti Pot lol).

      Hmm so true- FB is full of whiners and braggers!! I find it quite negative too. There is no sense of humbleness on facebook. I have a friend on facebook who would take a picture of what her boyfriend got her for Valentines/ Birthday and share it online. Really? I don’t need to see that!

      Haha baby brags. Engagement brags, marriage brags! I guess you and I are drinking our haterade!

      Hmm the quite asking friends for advice thing- Thanks for posting that because I unfortunately was guilty of this! (though not on facebook).

      Yeah, I intentionally omitted my birthday on FB just because I didn’t want people to post on my FB wall to wish me a happy birthday out of obligation and a FB reminder that it was my birthday. I didn’t feel very special with the FB notes either.

      Dinner conversations, romantic dinners out… it’s all getting less and less “face to face” more people are actually “not being present” by being busy on facebook!

  38. And you, my friend, have laid out ALL of the reasons why I don’t have an will NEVER have a personal Facebook page. My dentist asked me to “like” him on Facebook. Like, really? Can I like you after you fix my teeth?

    P.S. Loving the haterade comment. Drink it in honey.

    • @Sandy- LOL Drink it honey- I heart you Sandy! Wow, even dentists are getting in on this social media thing. Wonder when its going to burst?

    • Good point Sandy! I’m a dental hygienist and I hate having dentists wanting me on facebook.
      A. I don’t want patients to stalk me.
      B. I don’t want to stalk patients. lol….
      Facebook=worst thing ever created for your mental health.

  39. Ha! this post beat my Website Income vs Dividend Stocks hands down – but for sure an excellent post :)

    I really got tired of the game requests, and all the other crap I got from FB. Not to mention they kept making it more difficult to change your privacy settings etc. No thank you!

    I also deactivated my facebook account this morning. Unfortunately Facebook doesnot delete the information, they only put your account on permanent hold. I would sure like to know what they do with that info even when its deactivated. ;)

    Cheers
    The Dividend Ninja

    • @TDN- LOL! I was hoping you would stop by to notice that this post beat your post! Now you must write another stellar guest post to beat this one! (LOL kidding!). Wow- congrats on deactivating your account! I was googling and saw that you can somehow delete the account but it’s difficult. They make it so easy to reactivate your FB account- I accidentally logged in one day (when I meant to log into my blog’s FB account) and was so shocked that it looked like I had never left. Glad we’re making good changes to make our lives more intentional and productive! :)

  40. There are stories you don’t hear. Facebook has destroyed marriages, lives ect.. but has also brought together children that never seen their parents, family members.
    People have been kiiled over FB, there are negative stories. Just B careful!

    • @Tonya- So true Tonya- there are many positives to Facebook and I am grateful for them. It’s been a few weeks since I’ve been off FB and I am feeling more productive so am still happy with my decision (so far!).

  41. The privacy side of facebook really is dangerous. With every post being owned by faceboook and indexed by facebook it seems that all facebook users will end up regretting some of the things that they posted. When all of those teenagers on facebook grow up and have their potential employees looking into their online history alot more people may be deleting their accounts.

    • @juan- Totally agree. My BF had no idea that his pictures were public (not that there was anything obscene about them or anything) for the longest time. One has to keep really vigilant about their privacy settings!

  42. great post! I did have a couple of FB pages at one point, but they were never in my way name, age, location, gender or occupation. FB is a marketing tool and once they have your personal info, it’s their’s forever. my reasons:

    occupation made it hard for me to paste my likeliness anywhere
    privacy is optimum priority
    did not want pics of me anywhere
    wanted to be Invisible online
    did not want anyone to find, even if they already had my info
    FB does not give me a dime for profiting on my personal info
    my name is copyrighted, so they have to pay me to use my info (so much for the strawman :) )
    I only have a handful of friends and others I consider associates or acquaintances
    I do not feel the NEED to be bombarded with others’ personal lives, if I wanted to know, I’d ask
    the idea of someone else telling me that I should like something does not sit well with me
    anything anyone wants to know about me I want to know about also, because I want to know why they want to know (golly, try saying that three times fast! hahaha!)
    employers asking for my FB is a no no. why don’t i have one? well, that’s really personal and not anyone’s business but mine.
    I had a couple of stalkers when I was a teen and the police did not do anything, so I “disappeared”
    any info you post online anywhere will leave a print, will always lead back to you somehow

    there’s many reasons not to have an FB account. I do not have a smart phone, FB page anymore, (never had a personal one) Now that Im a single parent, in my early 30’s and financially independent, I really dont want others knowing in my circle, otherwise Im bound to get a hand reaching out…

    • @Sandy- Awesome- thanks for sharing yoru reasons- those sound like all valid reasons. I once heard that a friend’s friend posted their family potrait on facebook.. and then a few months later, another friend saw her friend’s family on a BILLBOARD in Europe.

      Someone took that picture and used it in an advertisement! Without their consent or knowledge.

      WTF eh?

  43. I originally gave up FB for lent after being on it every single day, and deactivated my acct so I wouldn’t cheat. I felt SO empowered cutting that out of my daily life, that I can’t bring myself to log back on-three weeks after Easter (that was the day I could have been able to get back on) . Yeah, I was forgotten on an invite, people forget I don’t know things now, but I like living a way where I don’t need everyone’s approval everyday in “likes” or comments, I don’t miss the passive aggressive comments, and I really love my privacy!!!!

    • I have one friend that did it for lent, and she just about went crazy. I guess like many things it is a tool, and if it makes your life better, then go for it right? Obviously you realized that this wasn’t the case and subsequently made a good life choice! Who knew that one of the biggest legacies of FB would be the realization of taking privacy for granted.

  44. LOL Just erase my FB. NOW.
    I can see FWS coming anytime soon.
    I never was a stalker person, so when a saw myself wasting a day looking into strangers lifes. I knew: It’s time to let it go.

    So I found this page and just read All the reasons a deactivated my page. Perhaps I may have done the right thing.

  45. I moved abroad a year and a half after leaving college, so I use fbook to keep up with friends that I don’t talk to on a regular basis. It makes me feel connected still, in a passive sort of way. However, I too find myself looking at my newsfeed 20x a day — especially when fbook is now linked to apps on phones/iPads/iPods that notify you multiple times a day. As you noted in your article, I have also ID’ed fbook as a major time thief. I’d like to think I’m not an addict, but perhaps I am.

    I’m not keen to deactivate my page due to the fact that I do keep in touch with many people this way, but I’ll take a step in that direction by de-activating all these darn notifications/emails/phone dingdings… Thanks for the motivation & inspiration.

  46. When I was in school, going on facebook was a huge distraction from schoolwork and studying for exams. When I got off facebook, people were like how can we contact you or notify you of things? My reply: “The phone, text, email”. Their reply: “Oh so you’re old school.” Well a lot of people are still communicating the old school way, you know!

    Whereas I can see Facebook being very useful to communicate with people you rarely see because they live so far away, I just find it such a time waster. I’ll be looking through how many different pictures and pages of friends of friends, only to find that 2 hours have gone by! One friend even joked about creating a group for getting me back on Facebook. If a certain number of (I forget how many)people joined that group, I would have to reactivate my account. lol. Needless to say, that never happened. I have been Facebook free for several years now.

  47. Excellent post! I just deactivated my fb today was well. And the truth is I NEEDED it. I admit it I have a facebook addiction and I just gave my own self an intervention. Facebook is a powerful tool I think and in my opinion it’s a double-edged sword. It can be a nice tool to keep in touch with people you live away from but more often than not it’s a destructive tool. Most of the reasons you mentioned are why I decided to deactivate myself but I can add a few more things. I am currently on a 3-month summer vacation away from my boyfriend of 1.5 years. Long story short I’ve known him and we’ve been in love with each other for four years but it wasn’t until 1.5 years ago that we actually dated and got into a relationship and frankly I KNOW him too well. He is the sweetest guy ever yet the most careless guy I know. Common mannerisms like calling or texting your gf when in distance just flies over the top of his head. He doesn’t get that when 2 people in a committed relationship are far from each other, communication through phone or skype or heck even MSN are important. But he just does NOT get that. Instead he is on facebook liking some girl’s status or being tagged in pics with random girls in bikinis that he met on vacation. And ofcourse facebook being the malicious tool it is, constantly shows me my bf’s news on my newsfeed. And I just really got so sick of it. I am tired of seeing him do things more important than keeping in touch with his gf. And I am also so damn tired of seeing college girls looking the same and acting the same! I swear it’s as if there is this massive global mist among girls that’s forcing them to dress, act, and look the same way. Yeah I admit it, in your own words facebook brought out “the jealous green eyed monster in me” but also it brought out the confused WTF monster in me! haha. Is it just me or is almost everyone on facebook the same? 100s of photo albums about vacation sites and clubs and lounges they’ve been to. All of the girls’ profile pictures are the same, stick figures, long straight black or beach blonde hair, low cut tops and lots of cleavage showing, mini-skirts that I swear if she bent a little further her underwear would show. Now I am not hating, seriously I am a believer in liberty and enjoyment of the human body but come on! EVERYONE looks the same now. Don’t even get me started on the guys, they all have either sports cars on their dps/cover photos or pictures of them in suits/tux as their dps. And ofcourse there always has to be an album collection of perfectly snapped photos by DSLR and professional cameras. I am so tired of facebook because it no longer serves the purpose of “keeping in touch” with good friends but instead it’s become a massive jerk fest where everyone is subconsciously compelled to compete with everyone else simply because if you don’t you’ll not “fit in” society. You don’t have a facebook account? OMG you still live in the ice ages :)
    Not to mention the hours wasted on fb when you could be doing a 100 other more useful things. I am done with facebook, and I am also done waiting on facebook for a message from my boyfriend haha! Seriously, his time is spent commenting on videogame photos on fb than to send me the occasional hi I miss you. By the way, I am 22 and so is he. :p

    Great post though, REALLY affirmed what I needed to hear :) Thank you!

    • @tiktaktoe- Oh my goodness you couldn’t have said it ANY better!! Seriously you are right- all girls are starting to look the same! Are they just hollow on the inside? Why do they have to make themselves look good and make sure their facebook photos look good? It baffles me that women out there are SO insecure that they have to degrade themselves to that level.

  48. I just deactivated my facebook today and for the same reasons you posted. I already feel better for deleting it and like a huge weight has been lifted.

    I hated the “highschool” clique mentality where it’s all about the number of “likes” you get for a stupid, self-absorbed post. It’s almost as if people use facebook to validate their existence and worth, which is pretty sad. People make everything seem “perfect” when it is not. Either that, or they are complaining about every tiny thing. The worst part is I had a boss who would be on facebook all day at her desk, using it to gossip on people and compare her life to theirs. My own boss was a facebook zombie addict while on the clock and getting paid!!! I want to wake up everyone and say ” Hey! facebook is ruining your confidence, relationships, and honor!” If you are reduced to relationships that revolve around “LOL” and “LMAO” then it is very, very sad. It’s sad what facebook has done to our society and even worse that not many people realize it. Are we really all that stupid and insecure? With facebook bullying, depression, and addiction it’s a wonder that we have an obesity epidemic. Everyone is glued to their computer screen and not at the blue sky outside.

  49. I deleted facebook because I got sick of it, when I look back I realised I spent 3 years of my life logging in everyday updating my status about my life when it should have no real interest to other people,My life is my life and I realised I was spending to much time on it,At one time I had like 250 odd facebook friends 30 of which I would probably call associates and about 3 or 4 true friends who I would actually see in person time to time again the rest where just family members aunties uncles cousins,I realise there is to much bullshit on it people always posting stupid statuses to get attention or backstabbing other people or internet rumours starting because you haven’t logged in in a couple of days or people even asking you and ringing you saying like “Why aren’t you on facebook no more?”,People also posting pictures of food and everyday pics of themselves or their babies,I miss the days when facebook was just for your true friends and family,Then you get old school class mates adding you who you never talked to at school but then next thing they are on your facebook knowing your personal life,People also take things to heart on there and don’t understand cyber humour,In the end I just had enough of it so got rid of it,I’ve been off it a week now and feel good and better and I don’t think I really want to go back to that facebook world,I’m glad I found this article and comments section to now know I’m not the only one with the same feelings
    :)

  50. I’ve decided to delete my facebook. It hasn’t done a positive thing for me in my entire time on it!!! It’s got me into fights with friends over opinions, Helped cost me a relationship.. Made me go a little crazy over being blocked and having to block people from my own account… My only worry is I have tons of pictures of my daughter and myself and I have to remove them all before.. But I’ll just store them on my computer and on a small external drive to make sure I always have them….. F**k FB!!!!!! I never myspaced or Twitted so why fb????

  51. Thanks for the article. I wanted to add to this because after a few trial deactivations, I feel I’ve finally deactivated for the long run from fb. I found it useful in the beginning, but then it started to get annoying with all the nonsense. It really was becoming a place for stalkers and braggers. The few people who really appreciated the stuff I put on there eventually got tired and stopped commenting. I did it mostly for myself to read back, but was anybody really reading anymore? I had to deactivate because of the voyeuristic ones. I didn’t realize until much later that these people were looking a little too much. I have to say I was caught in the reading and looking at photos too which is why I thought it was a waste of time and not healthy. My self esteem no matter how solid felt crushed every time I logged on fb. I didn’t want to be a part of the bragging anymore. I didn’t want to be a part of the attention-seeking and their manipulation. There were those who would use pictures and statuses to manipulate me if I somehow did something they didn’t like. Even if you are active but don’t log on, they would post quotes assuming that I would be reading. Only way to break free and “turn of the station broadcast” is to deactivate. I can always contact my friends another way. I’m much happier and I don’t feel as isolated as I thought. Other friends who never had fb are doing just fine. I’m glad to join there company.

  52. I deleted Facebook yesterday. I am tired of people, some of them family, being rude and offensive online. They wouldn’t do that if you were face to face with them, so why do type it on a computer? All Facebook has done is cause problems within my family. I originally joined by hoping to share my photography with everyone, but it seems that all people want to do is brag about themselves and put others down.
    After 2 1/2 years, I come to realize that Facebook is not for me and I am not going back!

    Great article!!!!!

  53. Well, I, too, deactivated my FB account. I didn’t delete, because I have many nice photos on FB that I’d like to retrieve and have lost them on computers, etc over the years. I’m horrible at getting actual photos that I can put in a frame, and then my computer crashes and poof! There they go.

    I deactivated for somewhat different reasons from everyone else on here, which maybe makes me the offender? I don’t know. When I first joined (6 yrs ago! Wow) like many of you said, it was fun to reconnect with long lost people, etc. People back then were MORE inclined to share about themselves – tell me 20 weird things about you stuff, etc. I found it very interesting. And I found out a lot of stuff I didn’t know. I actually liked the sharing and interacting amongst everyone. It seemed to be the point of FB.

    Now, everyone is so guarded, only wanting to put their best foot forward, with their bland Xmas card posts, bland homemade artwork from their kids, bland I’m at such-and-such airport. Whoopee-doo. What happened to the fun? I would joke on there, and seemed to be the only one starting up actual conversations after awhile. Nothing dramatic, just random stuff, trying to keep things light and humorous.

    I have done well in life, which might come as a shock to some people I knew as a child or in high school. I became very rebellious as a teen, hated high school, got terrible grades, smoked in the bathroom, skipped classes, and dressed like a member of a rock band (unacceptable at a school that churns out accountants). I am not at all a braggart – just giving people some background – but if I did post a pic, it was a family pic at a party, or us trick or treating, just everyday stuff. So you could see the mansions in the background, the pimped out parties for 3-yr olds. It’s my life, but not done to purposefully brag. Worried people would judge that (which indeed they did) I’d also post that someone asked how far along I was at the dentist office (I am not pregnant) and other humbling things. Then I realized that I was purposefully being overly humble. I felt no one liked me because I had done well for myself, so I’d find myself saying constant self depreciating things and purposefully not sharing stuff for fear it would inadvertently piss people off. Who wants to see flowers and green grass when it’s blizzarding where they are (I’m from a cold climate and now live in Southern California). And it got to the point where just being myself was not okay. Stuff I should be excited about I couldn’t share for fear of offending people. Stuff that got me down amused people. I realized that everyone disliked me. All of these friends were secretly (some not so secretly) wishing me ill. Then I deactivated. And cried. Not because of not being on FB, but the realization that no one wanted to see me happy, smart, cracking jokes and lsuccessful. What a hurtful realization. I sincerely wish everyone well and has maybe 100 people on there that I actually knew. And many of these people, I thought, were my friends. Nope. They were “frenemies.” No one from my past wanted to see the loser from high school married a Harvard Law grad and had several successful businesses of her own. I couldn’t talk about anything. My life inadvertently offended people. So…what was the point? I can’t show photos? I can’t say anything? And no one else was either. The purpose of FB was gone. It just became a constant newsfeed about games, people complaining about the weather or taking photos of what they ate. Boring!

    I will remain off of FB, and not go back. I will allow myself to be okay with my life, my car, my house, where I live, whom I married, what I look like, and not feel the need to hide it. I’m going to just be me. Now that I’m middle aged, I don’t have time for people who still have a high school mentality.

    Moreover, people would friend me – people I hadn’t seen in like 25 years – and then not one word from them. No “hello.” Nothing. So I’d send a message saying “nice to see you, hope all is well, etc.”. No response. In real life, it would be crazy to tap someone on the shoulder that you haven’t seen in 25 years and then when they turn around and say “hi!” you just ignore them and walk away. Why is it ok on FB? Or anywhere? Ugh, just the whole thing. Ugh. Seems to bring out the worst in people.

    I still feel the need to apologize for mentioning my lifestyle here! Oh dear. It will take awhile for me to be okay with me again after years of hiding/downplaying/feeling badly. Good grief.

  54. Well, I completely agree with you!
    since I’ve deactivated my FB (3 days now, but I’m looking forward for more), I’ve actually become a HAPPY person! I’m a normally-functioning human being without all the destructive sides of Technology taking over my human life. And hey, I actually started checking out other non-addictive websites on the internet!
    Advice to all of you, stop the “I do my work on it” excuse, and deactivate it for a while. See the comfort you feel!

  55. I loved your article. I just deactivated my Facebook page and I actually feel a sense of relief…phew! Now I just need to be strong and commit not to go back. And you are it’s a total time waster.
    Need to plan what to do with the free time I will have now.
    Any ideas?? :)

  56. I got sick of the mud slinging between various football team supporters – it goes from friendly banter to total insults and hatred.

    Also nobody needs to know my location, thoughts and feelings on a daily basis.

  57. yes i quite facebook in january 2014 and am never going back.

    i feel so much more productive. facebook is not only time wasting, it clogs your mind up with alot of useless information and actually affects your ability to focus.

    above all when you quit facebook, you realise who your true friends are.

    i also did find it was creepy how you can know about people’s lives and not even talk to them in person.

    i also hated that many people would get together to gossip about what the lives of people of highschool turned out to be like.

    it made me realise that some strange highschool classmate is probably gossiping about my personal life too. creepy.

    i also got really annoyed the way this past high school friend of mine actually started asking me lot of questions about my life now and when i replied to her email and started asking her questions she did not answer anything i asked. this happened twice.
    just made me realise she is just a nosy stalker on facebook.

    i think one day all these people that are addicted to facebook will wake up in their old age and realise that they are not living in reality. however it will be too late.

    it is more important to focus on friends that are immediately around you than on people you know you will never see again.
    quality is more important than quality.

    i also got tired of the attention seeking freaks on facebook.
    particularly people that have over 400 friends. 1000 would make me sick.
    i knew this one guy who would add every single chick he met at a bar on the weekend to his facebook to make himself seem popular.
    facebook is the perfect breeding ground for narcissists and people with vanity disorders.

    seriously . of those 400 plus friends, how many of them do you actually talk to on a regular basis.

    i also have a friend that was always lonely on the weekend but yet she had 400 plus friends on facebook . seriously . someone clearly needs to re-evaluate their meaning of the term friendship.

    i also got tired of the fakeness on facebook. people trying to portray their lives as being more interesting/glamorous than it really is when in reality it was a different story. when i realised some of my own friends were doing this it made me realise that maybe most people on my facebook were doing this.

    facebook is just evil and annoying.

    it is funny that facebook was invented by someone that was socially awkward and in turn people that consider themselves to be cool , use facebook as a tool for judging and bullying people that they consider to be socially awkward.

    mark zuckerburg is the ultimate nerd seeking his revenge on all society. instead of going into a school and killing everyone, he is silently killing everyone’s souls with facebook.

    i am so glad i quit it. never to return.

    the number one thing people in this life complain about is a lack of time. yet think of all the time people spend on facebook posting nonsense and creating a virtual reality to make themselves feel better about their sad REAL lives .

    Since i quite facebook i feel so much more in tune with reality.

    Glad to see more and more people are waking up to the realities of facebook.

    Good can never come out of evil.

    mark zuckerburg stole the idea of facebook from his classmates. look at what has become of it.

    it is completely ruining society.

    get out while you can and preserve your sanity .

    love you all my fellow facebook quitters xxxx

  58. I deactivated mine for most of the same reasons you posted and others,It is boring and it is evil I don’t need to know what others are up to in their lives and they don’t need to post every detail of their lives,It’s become the keeping up with the Jones if your friends are all doing it and posting it on Facebook then it’s like you gotta do it to that’s what I found so annoying about it and I don’t want to be apart of that anymore

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