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Sam over at Financial Samurai recently shared an experience he had at a club in San Francisco, titled “Beautiful, Rich, and Still Single.. I wonder Why”. He met this seemingly nice and attractive girl named Cynthia. She turned out to be highly educated (a doctor of dental medicine student) and appeared quite wealthy, judging by her Manolo shoes and Chanel purse.
Not only was she confident, Sam felt that she seemed over confident. She told Sam that the reason she was still single was because she was too attractive and too successful.
This made me think about why there are so many people out there who are on the ‘prowl' for a significant other, but who also have overly inflated self esteem?
Is it because we were all brought up to feel that we have done well (teachers giving us gold stars for simply completing the homework assignment, certificates for participation etc.)? Are we all living in bubbles? What ever happened to modesty?
One of my guy friends was at a club recently. He is a successful, genuinely nice guy. He is very open and friendly and when you meet him, you quickly realize that he doesn't have any pretenses.
He was recently at a packed club and he accidentally spilled a girl's drink (it was just so packed in there, everyone walking around with their drinks makes for a recipe for disaster). Now, I don't mean to be judgmental, but the girl was average looking (certainly did not look like Cynthia at Sam's club).
The girl was with her female friend and her female friend instantly piped up and said “HEY! You spilled her drink!!” He realized what he had done and felt awful. He immediately offered to buy her another drink.
The three of them went up to the bar and as they were waiting for the bartender to serve them, he decided to strike up some polite conversation with the girl whose drink he spilled. Her friend meanwhile was very nonchalant looking and not engaging with my friend. She was looking at her cellphone the entire time and was texting someone. I think I saw some eye rolls in there as my friend was talking to her friend.
As my friend was talking to the girl, I noticed that she was very abrupt with him. She barely made eye contact with him and was simply rude to him. She was very short with her answers to his polite questions. They were making sure that they got right up to the bar so that they could watch to see if he was putting Roofies or drugs into her drink.
Judging from her ambivalent behaviour, it really seemed like she thought he was hitting on her by “ACCIDENTALLY” spilling her drink and therefore creating an excuse to buy her a drink and talk to her. The friend also was talking about how she needs to see the drink to make sure he wasn't trying to drug her.
First of all, girls who are interested in trying to get picked up by guys should try not to be defensive 24/7.
Guys are not ALWAYS trying to get into your pants (lol, right??). Sometimes some guys really are just nice and trying to be good people.
That being said, I'm sure there are a lot of guys who are good for nothing and are douche bags, but I think that if you have your back up 100% time, you close yourself to meeting genuinely nice guys.
I haven't been inside a club in a long time before this (I think the last time I went was a year ago) and it ALWAYS intrigues me to watch the behaviour of females and males in a club. It's like watching the Discovery Channel. Fascinating, really!
I recently read a great article in Vancouver Magazine titled “Do Vancouver Men Suck?” about how men are seemingly very casual, very passive in this city. It could be because women here in Vancouver tend to be stuck up and think any guy who is “nice” to them and genuine is trying to get them into bed.
Readers, do you agree with me? Do you think that there are a lot of Cynthia's out there? Guys, do you find that girls seem to be on the defense when you try to strike up conversation with them?
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